Here are my resolutions (which I don’t make) for 2004: I will leave my caps lock on 24x7x364, using Title Case on the 4th of July only. I will find a way to catch and save the little, black and green detritis unloosed through dental flossing. I will convince one person each week throughout the year that someone is out to get them, and that that someone is getting closer and closer.

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