Say what you want about Donald Trump, the customer service at his properties is insanely great. And The Donald personally sets the standard for that service. He also inspects it, and he has a sick level of attention to detail. Donald Trump doesn’t miss a thing when it comes to providing a perfect environment for his guests and residents.
The opposite is true of the TSA. Like most government-run operations, the TSA sucks at customer service. Here are some recent headlines about the way TSA treats flying consumers:
CHICAGO (CBS) — Travelers flying out of Chicago just can’t catch a break. With increasingly long lines to get through security at the city’s airports, many travelers have been missing their flights, and some ended up sleeping at O’Hare International Airport on Sunday.
American Airlines put out cots for fewer than 100 travelers who missed their flights Sunday night due to the long lines at TSA security checkpoints.
Adrian Petra said he missed his flight after standing in line for 2 hours and 20 minutes.
TSA agents stood around and cracked jokes while passengers waited over four hours
Travelers faced a rough Monday morning at Atlanta’s Hartsfield-Jackson International Airport as security wait times climbed to over an hour.
People took to social media to post photos of the line snaking through the main security area and into baggage claim.
Channel 2’s Steve Gehlbach reported lines were over an hour long. Some travelers tweeted saying the lines were longer.
And the government blamed customers, of course. Homeland Security issued this rebuke to complaining passengers:
There are several factors that have caused checkpoint lines to take longer to screen passengers… including more people traveling with carry-on bags, in many cases bringing more than the airline industry standard of one carry-on bag and one personal item per traveler;
Passenger preparedness can have a significant impact on wait times at security checkpoints nationwide…Individuals who come to the TSA checkpoint unprepared for a trip can have a negative impact on the time it takes to complete the screening process.
So what’s the solution? Donald Trump, of course.
Who else could turn a customer service nightmare into a beautiful experience you want to brag about on TripAdvisor? Donald Trump.
If I were Trump’s campaign team, I’d be all over this. “Don’t worry, American fliers, President Trump knows how to make airport security the greatest customer service organization in the world. It will be beautiful! You’re gonna love it!”
The best part? Those won’t be government TSA bureaucrats doing the screenings–they’ll be private Trump-trained screeners. Free enterprise, baby.
If I were one of those TSA agents coking and joking about the two and a half hour lines, I’d freshen up my resume. They’re about to hear The Donald say, “You’re fired!”
[Tweet “We Want Private Trump-Trained Airport Screeners”]